Saturday, December 29, 2007

holy cow...

i just saw this...




and this...


and this...



but... i read this and went shucks.

YOUTH‘08: Malaysia’s Youth Lifestyle Showcase will be held at PWTC from the 18th till 20th January 2008 to promote and highlight the main aspects of the trendy Malaysian youth lifestyle – entrepreneurship, education, entertainment, fashion, health, technology, career and charity. Targeted at 50,000 youths between the ages of 18 to 30, it will be the largest ground event involving youths within this age group.

i wish i had the chance... but what else is there to say? sigh...

i've decided on what i'd like to study after form 5. FINALLY.

CULINARY ARTS!

odd huh?
maybe it's just a sudden thing. like...

when how i wanted to become a mycologist but backed out because i was afraid i would get infected by some weird fungi.

or when i wanted to go to BJSS and become a national badminton player but backed out because i am not good enough.

or when i wanted to become a toxicologist but suck at my bio.

or when how i wanted to become an architect because i love art and study science but decided not to because it's office work.

or when i wanted to become a politician but realised i was far from being eloquent.

all those seemingly impossible ambitions. haha.


but i guess i'd like culinary arts. i like experimenting with food but i don't cook all that often. besides, i like watching the asian food channel (yum...) and jamie oliver's and sugar (the desserts there are superbly yummy looking). yeah, i'm gonna try a hand at cooking dinner for a party maybe on new year. i'm not sure how i'll fare. hopefully no food poisoning! maybe i'll do take up culinary arts in the local unis then go switzerland or something to further it. sounds cool?


i really am game for this.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

my belated christmas gift



i'm officially a malaysian organ donor!


M
ERRY CHRISTMAS, WORLD!

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

a series of (in)famous quotes

A: *gasp* let's go "eew". 1,2...
A&B: EEW!!!
...................................................................................

D: hey, hey, people, it's raining!
A: oh, i'm gonna melt!
C: so plastic la you, A.
A: plastic melts.
C&E: uhh.... =.="

....................................................................................

A: haih! let me see la! (snatches violently)

Monday, December 17, 2007

007 - highlights

there were lots of occasions which i had fun during camp that i left out... hehe...

the chilli padi challenge... di-yan challenged me to eat 5 chilli padis and chew on them for 1 minute.

when we first settled into our rooms... although i am not all that close to serene, the 3 of us (jess, serene and i) talked about things we rarely talk.

the last night in karjie & chrys' room... jess, serene, joanna, chrys, karjie, debbie and i packed into a twin bed and chatted till past 3.

second morning... i saw an otter from my balcony swimming in the sea.

my 2 p&w sessions... i really enjoyed playing as a band this camp. this was one of the rare times i stamped so hard on the bass drum. my drumsticks are finally injured!!!

being a guard on my game session... i don't think there is a need to explain.

what's frog?... i held the frog for an extremely long time!

mission 4... being carried by darren followed by vincent on their shoulders thought me how to trust. darren swayed a lot but he said this, "don't worry, yiwen. it may seem like you're falling but you're not. i'm holding on to you." i guess that's what Jesus is always saying to us:


DON'T WORRY. IT MAY SEEM LIKE YOU'RE FALLING BUT YOU'RE NOT. I'M HOLDING ON TO YOU.


mission 5 "prize"... we had to do a dance to the chicken song. whatever that is. jason ling lead us agents 001 in the chicken dance. hilarious and tiring....

ok...so that wraps up my drabble on YOUTH CAMP 007 - MOVING FORWARD (after a week).

i'm looking forward to the next one.


007 - Day 4

Day 4

crossing my jordan

that hit me rock hard.

my jordans?
i have tonnes of them.

altar call:
i went for the 2nd group for those who want strength from God to cross their jordans. generally, i prayed for the CF. since the news that the school CF is now under my tutelage, i've been crying out to God for strength, strength and more strength. the reason? i'm actually afraid on taking up this heavy duty. well, cf is not just any society, fellowship or whatever to be taken lightly. things happen. you deal with God, you deal with spiritual realms. so yup...simple logic: you do things for God, the devil ain't happy. he comes and attacks you to deter you from bringing more people back to Christ. deep... but plain simple too. so i'm pretty worried on how i'd fare next year. i mean the previous presidents before me are prayerful people... i daren't say i'm all that "holy, holy, holyyyyy". it's gonna be
tough
tough
tough

ok.

the missing tie still hadn't turned up. so yeah... i gave up hope on ever finding it again. i actually realised i would miss the beach and the sound of waves crashing down on the beach...

sand, sea, sun.

opening concert? cool. picked up lots of pointers from qivin's playing. i think my playing calls for some ... variation!

packed up.

ooo yeah... confrontation happened. serene was scarieeee. but heck it worked right jess???

helped load the drumset into the bus without much hassle. i sat in the bus with karjie but switch, kerry (again), switch, emily, switch, di-yan... then...

IPOH!

007 - Day 3

DAY 3
by day 3, i can honestly say that i was tired till my brains were fried.
i LOVED the beach a lot. mainly, that's why i LOVE penang so much more than my hometown itself.
we had a round of station games through the session which was actually better than sitting down 'cos i was so darned sleepy. but well, yeah... it was sort of spoilt by some ... one. ok... nvm i shall not dwell on unpleasant events. but well, at "what's christian?" station, i got my chance to actually speak. WOW. generally, although i'm one of the OLD members at MYF, i barely spoke much during group activities. heck, i don't wanna dwell on it once again. but yeah, i had my opinions on the task at hand, and "bunny" here kept interupting what i was about to say.
"this one's here 'cos we had this lesson that said, 'everythin is permissi-"
"I think that it's like this cos BLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLABLA"
ok... so my thanks be unto darren for actually shutting this recording player and turning the focus to me to explain my angle of understanding.
so *breathe in* here goes *breathe out*.
we are all PERSON(s) but some of us are CHRISTIAN. our PERSON side accepts all things but it is our CHRISTIAN side which denies these unhealthy things.
silence.
so (object lesson here...) the CHRISTIAN is in the PERSON. (hands moving the papers to demonstrate my point, as always..visualise....)
pindrop silence.
so,my point is that the CHRISTIAN paper goes behind the PERSON cos it acts like a "penapis". err... you get it? PERSON. PERSON with CHRISTIANITY. CHRISTIAN side deny bad stuff. yup.
ok yeah..
GREEN LIGHT!
ACCEPTED.
ok
i felt bangga, man, cos yeah, dominating bunny was out, out and away!!! ok... this is mean but i was honestly beaming inside cos yeah, this thing used kind of a lot of thinking. esp my group couldn't come to terms with other opinions but everyone said "aye" to this. so it was great. besides, it was one of the 2 winning entries which made me go SWELLLLL....
woohoo
afternoon games were fun too. i was erm handicapped in the game cos my wrists were tied together. i think i ran like some chicken trying to fly. chickens can't fly.... so yeah... it was that bad. darren was REALLY a very encouraging group leader. honestly, he's the BEST ever. i look up to him thoroughly for being able to gel the group together although all of us are SO different. till now, i can really mix with pooi chee and mun yee although they are quite chinese-y.
our group cheer presentation wasn't as good as our practices but it was still as good. (how contradicting)
STOP, DROP & ROLL!
after that... clean-up time..
hugo, deb and i were at one water hose trying to hose ourselves clean. we were like doing carwash minus the soap... eugene (at another water hose with sean) challenged hugo to do like some hottest poses using the hose. hugo did some muscle man thing which was incredibly hilarious. eugene did too but of course hugo rocked! then, eugene did skipping with the rubber hose. our hose was very much longer so hugo decided to do a 3-person skipping while turning the rope.
attempt 1: FAILED
attempt 2: successfull!
all 3 of us managed to jump across the hose without getting our heads lopped off. haha...
challenge winner?
HUGO & co.
night games? brain exhaustion.
having duncan in the group was fun. stephen was the mole. haha. no one suspected.
chatted with my karjie, joanna, jess, chrys, (sleeping) debbie and serene till it was past 3 am in karjie's room.
later...
KO

Saturday, December 15, 2007


i'm going


GREEN

no plastics or fakes that can pollute my environment.



GO GREEN:

for a healthier life


i'm


GREEN

007 - Day 2

Day 2

Moving Forward is Moving Backwards
oh ... embrace your past!
didn't get the session.

devotion time...? great =)

games? an 8 out of 10. great job people!

i spent free time fretting over the night mission. things didn't seem very clear about our games. not enough time to hide the stuff... went around hunting for the camp helpers and so i ended up with a meagre dinner of 1 hard-boiled egg, plain rice and some turnip. =( no tau-yu bak for me!

so yeah... i was to give briefing for the games in the parking area. it was supposed to be like a mission story, as in...

we have received a transmission. 8 boxes containing valuable treasure have been reported missing. the task of finding these boxes have been handed down to you. however... you are all, unfortunately, NOOB agents with no equipments to call your own. in order to find them, you need 7 equipments which are marked with your groups' colour. if you find an item with a different colour marker, you are forbidden to sabotage the other agents. there is a catch though. becauses the treasure is so valuable, there are many guards guarding them. they carry "laser guns" so, if their beam catches you, you must obey them in order to continue your quest. after you have found the 7 items, you are to find (master) hugo chong who will give you your "training" and will give you your ticket to your next mission.

hugo will just actually make them dress up as james bond with the 7 items which are:
-styrofoam plate hat
-water gun
-"ninja" sword
-sunnies
-pen
-tie
-magnifying glass

then, GROUP PIC.

the group goes down to the beach to meet informant shao wen who gives them an ang pow with a puzzle inside which is actually a cut up pic of their group leader with a riddle behind.


however... the group was so rowdy and noisy that i couldn't give a proper briefing. for a moment, i think that this "prefect" side of me came up...


PLEASE GET INTO ONE STRAIGHT LINE NOW!

sounds familiar, mgs-ians???

the hailer didn't seem to be on my side either. =( so yeah, bad start...

i became a guard.. it was darned funny watching everyone crouch when my beam shone nearby. it was like remote control. jason ling was going around with his "mr. punisher" thing. haha... there were lots of problems in this game... it was tough. people were tired... felt like giving up because the stuff was so hard to find... made me feel "sigh" too.

anyway... sabotages happened, accidental or purely on purpose, we don't know. but one of my ties are missing. fortunately it was my sis's old blue prefects' tie... so it was ok. if it was mine, or her acs monitor tie or my bro's "silk" smi tie, i'll fry myself crisp. seriously... i was pretty upset over this but shao wen, darren, aren, elaine (low) and other peeps made things much better...

THANKS!

Friday, December 14, 2007

007 - Prep and DAY 1

CAMP 007: MOVING FORWARD
10 - 13 DECEMBER 2007
STELLA MARIS, PENANG

Prep
we form 4s were to prepare for the games so i was kinda excited. my games group was:
shaowen
joseph
shuevoon
kelsey
me

but... shuevoon and kelsey couldn't make it so there were only 3 of us left. we were going for the amazing race-fear factor-survivor concept but it didn't turn out. so we went for snake and ladder. didn't work out. after a 4 hour meeting we came up with our game. prep was tough. i slept at 2 am the night before camp (or the morning of camp day). when i saw my group list... i just went dunno, dunno, dunno... bleark.

Day 1
bus ride! i was in the "hotdog" bus... meaning unisex bus. boring... i sat alone at first but kerry came. so i was stuck there 'cause he slept. ok... lunch time. we ate at some place in air itam. i had koay teow th'ng... quite "kwai"... 3 bucks??? not worth it. penang road's one is much nicer. back in the bus, i sat at another place. thank you, jason! so i sat alone at jason's place at the back and di-yan came to join me. didn't really talk but he did tell me his funny ambitions of becoming:

#1 a lorry driver
#2 a teacher
#3 a fireman

we also wow-ed a lot at the huge houses along scotland rd. that area. time was up and we reached destination:
STELLA MARIS
in my apartment there were:
R1 - serene,jess and i
R2 - debbie and agnes
R3 - sea bee ing, mei lee and mei lin

getting to know you session was fun. we played i'm the boss of you. in the end shao wen was my boss and di-yan was my "slave"(?). i was in group 6... under the tutelage of self-dubbed "Y.A.B." Darren, we came to know each one pretty well. here's my group members:

[darren]
my best group leader in history
[debbie]
supportive asst. leader
[wai soon]
quite fella but equally sporting
[wai sze]
really friendly person
[joshua]
the bookworm
[christopher]
another sporting guy
[vincent]
super semangat member
[daphne]
very spirited gal
[joo lee]
one of the camp helpers
[pooi chee]
super terrified of frogs but she managed!
[elliot]
"muscle guy"
[mun yee]
cheerful girl and loves to joke around
[jason]
another super semangat member
[agnes]
from cgbc... who is in "conflict" with darren.

darren's just got back from nz, so FRESH IDEAS. we are the AUTOBOTS. our cheer's darn cool.

hugagaga! hugagaga! hugagaga! hugagaga! hugagaga!
(autobots huddle together in a circle and stamp a foot inwards)

darren:
autobots, roll out! darren-bot!
(turn to face audience)
chris-bot!
daphne-bot!
elliot-bot!
wai soon-bot!
joshua-bot!
pooi chee-bot!
jason-bot!
vincent-bot!
yi wen- bot!
wai-sze-bot!
debbie-bot!
agnes-bot!
joo lee-bot!

(autobots come to live in a robotic manner)

darren:
autobots, gangster time.

(autobots shut down and get into position)

you've gotta STOP, DROP and ROLL!
till the lights go out, till the lights go out. (hands showing blinking movements)
you've gotta STOP, DROP and ROLL!
to the beach, to the beach. (rolling waves motion with hands in the beach's direction)
you've gotta STOP, DROP and ROLL!
in the church, in the church. (hands clasped together in prayer)
you've gotta STOP, DROP and ROLL!
say what? (hands to ears)
STOP, DROP and ROLL!
ok! ("ok" hand signal)
STOP, DROP and ROLL!
and again
STOP, DROP and ROLL
DROP and ROLL
DROP and ROLL
DROP and ROLL

a-u-t-o-b-o-t-s, a-u-t-o-b-o-t-s, a-u-t-o-b-o-t-s (chanting while getting into position)


A-U-T-O-B-O-T-S!
represent.

cool huh? darren's brainchild. i love it to bits. the actions are so cool too. seems like loads of people in camp are addicted to our cheer. STOP, DROP and ROLL!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

plastics. i shudder at the sight of them.

plastics, blonds, bimbos... whatever you call them.

i am

ANTI-PLASTIC

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

jesus vs. santa

christmas is approaching fast. have you done your shopping? have you set up your plastic christmas tree in your hall? have you hung up those messy christmas lights outside? so... christmas is all about what exactly? have our sights' been blurred by the "snow"? go to places like jusco and you'll hear familiar tunes like winter wonderland, rudolph the rednose reindeer and santa claus is coming to town. what does christmas have to do with snow, reindeers and fat ol' santa? heck... i celebrate christmas and yet there's no snow in malaysia. many christians themselves have driven off the road to the true meaning of christmas. we are so caught up with buying presents for others, hanging up little glass baubles, baking pies and singing carols that seem to uphold santa and elfs into public attention. okay, as a christian myself, i admit to being caught up in the shopping spirit.

about 2007 years ago... we all heard, learnt and know that jesus, the son of God, came down to earth and became the son of man so that all mankind will receive salvation because of the fall of man. then what does santa have to do with the birth of Christ?

ok.. according to my reading on this fat red man, this is his american origin:
the american version of santa received its inspiration and name from the dutch legend of sinter klaas, brought by settlers to new york in the 17th century. (note: it was only several hundred years ago). a poem written by clement clarke moore, entitled "a visit from st. nicholas" or rather more popularly known as "the night before christmas" described santa as well as his reindeers, including their names and how santa goes through the chimney. (why the chimney of all places? his red suit would turn black by the end of the day. absurdity). next, illustrator thomas nast depicted a rotund santa in harper's magazines christmas issues. while moore described santa as elf-sized, nast's version was human-sized. rudolph, the ninth reindeer, was invented in 1939 by an advertising writer for the montgomery ward company. santa is also closely related to st. nicholas of smyrna (izmir), which is now modern-day turkey, who helped the children and the poor. in protestant areas such as central and northern germany, st. nicholas was known as der weinaschtmann, whereas, in england, he was known as father christmas. he made his way into the US with dutch immigrants and was finally was referred to as santa claus. markus rautio revealed that santa lives on the finnish lapland's korvatunturi - "ear fell". the fell that resembles hare's ears are supposed to be santa's ear to hear whether kids are nice or naughty...

so... technically, santa is a folklore, unreal, unliving; just a mythical character derived from man's own imagination. unlike our living God, he lacks so much in many ways.


commentator: as you can see here, we are at the heavenly realm stadium. our two contenders are still warming up. on my left is... SANTA CLAUS in his red suit and black boots! whoo!!! and on my right-hand-side is JESUS CHRIST in his shining glory! nice tai-chi moves, santa. who do you think will win? whoa... santa's pretty confident and jesus is looking as calm and cool as always! and now... the ultimate...

SHOWDOWN: JESUS VS. SANTA
are you ready? 3, 2, 1... *ding*!

round 1:
santa is imaginary. jesus is real.

round 2:
santa is just another guy. jesus is God's only son.
whoo! they're both going on really well! the match is heating up!

round 3:
santa lives in the finnish lapland. jesus lives in your heart.

round 4:
santa has elves that help him in his workshop. jesus has angels that help him both in heaven and
on earth.
santa's really breathless! hmm... must be those extra kilos... can he hold? he's back and bouncing into action! next...

round 5!:
santa needs reindeers. jesus just... goes.

round 6:
santa is only there during christmas. jesus is always there.
oof! that was a hard punch! santa is sent sprawling to the ground! ok... while he's down there... jesus is perfectly fine! santa seems to be of no match to him! santa getting up... oh there you have him... santa! whoo! i'm excited...next!

round 7:
santa listens to see if we are naughty or nice. jesus knows whether we are naughty or nice.
whoa! santa! you look bashed... you want a time-out? oh... no? no? no! he says his fine! we have one tough bull here!

round 8:
santa receives letters from kids to know what they want. jesus knows what we want and what is good for us.

round 9:
santa gives gifts to children. jesus gives salvation, love, hope and peace to everyone who believes in him.
i think we don't need a round 10 anymore! santa's out cold... and we have an obvious winner!



JESUS.



are your priorities for christmas set right?
is santa more important than jesus?
are you haggled by the fuss of shopping

or
are you concentrating on the true meaning of christmas?

if you aren't
set your sights on JESUS this christmas!

it isn't too late.

for all christmas shoppers, we give gifts because GOD gave us the gift of eternal life but that doesn't mean we have to be bogged down by it.

don't bother if you receive plain gifts for christmas, because we already have the best gift ever:



JESUS.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

update on the night shift II

i finished the est essays last night and handed it up today.
i finished the add math thing this morning and handed it up today.
I FEEL SO RELIEVED!

my sis fell in school and landed in the most spectacular way. if she were a guy, it would have hurt. her skirt tore at the joining part... what do u call that in kh? kelim? haha. i laughed till my sides hurt when she told me.

kay lynn and i are rushing against time to complete the latecomers' list for form 5s. we still have form 3s to do and we only have a few days left! there's something wrong with the form 2 and form 4 list and i thoroughly pity jean-li and wai yee because they have just learnt the syst today and have to work full swing. SORRY!

currently listening to: miyavi KAVKI BOIZ ver. - selfish love-aishitekure, aishiterukara
currently feeling: rushed!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

update on the night shift I

record!
i've just finished 6 EST essays in 4 hours 30 minutes straight. only getting up once to answer the phone. wow... persistence pays off! so, conclusion is that i can discipline myself if i really wanted to. gives me more hope about next year. =)

add math project.. sigh.
i thought i could've passed it up today. asked tsl a few questions. BOOM! kena from her.

"AIYOO... why your graph like that? cannot.." and then "blablablablablablablablablabla" and "your data wrong!"

"no, teacher, i checked already"

"how can like that?" and "where you get your data?"

"collect lah"

"nooo... you check your frequency table again"

"ok" and "teacher, how do i count the standard deviation. this one i got 8.529 but this one i got 160... using the formula."

"ah?! how can? where is the computer one?"

"huh? i don't know how to do so i used formula."

"i told u already.. use computer better. now you have to count with calculator and then wrong." and "AIYA! pass up lah!"

she grabs my project and slaps in hard on the desk. like it was my fault that my data was all crazy. whatever. i shall not dwell on thoughts of her.

BM was fun. cik tengku asked me to organise a treasure hunt for the class with glenna's help. shocking. i don't think i'm her fave student. i don't pay att. in class.

there were 2 groups - puputhangarajoo and mo no ko ro boo.

they had to find 5 pieces of hidden coloured paper near the pavillion. once found you start solving the questions.

1. find 3 words in a word maze and use them to write peribahasa. the words were minum, api and bulan.

2. find objects from 3 sentences from 3 malay literature components. (flower, shoes, clothes, book, money)

3. belajar di 4S2 10A1 sudah pasti,
sebab semua guru hebat dan 'chun';
guru bm, matematik dan est,
terangkan personality guna pantun.

this was hilarious. puputhangarajoo's answers:

Tinggi langsing, anggun bergaya,
Memakai kasut tumit tinggi,
Beliau mengajar sedaya upaya,
Kita menjadi insan berakhlak tinggi.

Bercermin mata, berambut kerinting,
Berstoking panjang sampai ke lutut,
Tetap mengajar walaupun kami bising,
Itulah Cik Cheah yang lemah lembut.

"Ah buat" kata Puan Normaria,
Dengan gigih kami tekan kalkulator,
Dengan beliau kami bersuka ria,
Cermin matanya macam Harry Potter.

mo no ko ro boo's wasn't as funny and the jeda's a bit off so, pupu won this round.

4. this one they had to complete sentences taken from "serunai malam" and "budi yang tak terbeli"

5. they had to create and act out 1 scene with these characters Umar, Bibi Zainab and Safiah. i didn't really get to hear pupu's cos they were real soft and mo no's was gila (chinhui, of course la). something about umar is married to bibi. while he's gone, she has an affair with some guy. he comes back and sees them together. the guy's girl is safiah and she sees them as well. safiah says she's pregnant or something. i can't really make out the story...

in the end, the winner is PUPUTHANGARAJOO.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

10 REASONS WHY I CANNOT MARRY/DATE A J-ROCKER

i've started listening to a new genre of music which surprises many... but well, i'm me, right? so, from christian music, i've started listening to j-rock. MIYAVI. here's a random thought. read on:

#1 i can't speak japanese.
most of them speak hangol too but i can't either. and most of their english... ain't too good. they'd probably know the F-word, d***, sh** better than other words. LOL

#2 body art
i don't think i really appreciate body art. take miyavi, he's got so many tattoos esp. on his back. if i dated him and had a nasty break-up, he'd probably get a new tattoo that says "I HATE YIWEN" in chinese. and besides, he might contract some odd disease and spread it on to me (don't ask me how).

#3 self-inflicted pain
piercings. check the pic out. he's probably got more then 3 on both ears, 1 on his lip, on his brow, his nose... ah... i think if i were to kiss my j-rocker boyfriend, my lips would get hooked onto his piercing, like fishing, you know... ouch.

#4 hair
they've got ugly hair at times like miyavi in NEO VISUALIZM - half shaved, half long. i think it's called the "Kobo-chan cut" (it's said on miyavi's MASAKARASU's site) eeyuck... or the purple and red when he disturbed some person call Kai on youtube. or that silver bomb-to-the-side hair in an interview, or that or this... i think his normal hairstyle like the pic above is cool enough
#5 behaviour
their nuts. but that's what that's expected from rockers, right? my dad would get a cardiac arrest. sometimes, they act like they're gay or something... i dunno
#6 safety reasons
according to someone, miyavi's ex almost got stabbed to death by fans. I'M NOT WILLING TO DIE.
#7 time & availability
he'd probably be touring round the world promoting his latest album... japan, korea, china, germany, california, LV *inhale* ... i won't be able to see him because i'd most likely have a stable, NORMAL job like architecture or toxicology or something, UNLESS, i follow him and be a sound engineer or a band member... back-up singer... dancer....LOL i can't sing and dance.
#8 they are a bit weird
gackt claims to be 400 years old.
gackt believes he can communicate with the deceased aftter nearly drowning as a kid.
gackt like the smell of some coconut incense and he even eats it! uhh.... holy cow.
#9 dressing sense and fashionability
he'd probably won't be allowed to enter malaysia because of pakaian "mencolok mata" dan luar biasa. they wear odd stuff cos most of them are visual-kei.
#10 time, place and precise accuracy
i'll never get to meet any of them cos j-rockers are generally not allowed to come to conservative m'sia. (sometimes for a good reason eg. kyo, i think, from dir en grey, i think, does self-inflicted injuries on himself while on stage... cutting himself..) so...unless i actually meet them then things can happen otherwise nothing can happen right?
ok... so ALL IN ALL, IT IS NOT POSSIBLE FOR ME TO MARRY/DATE ANY J-ROCKER ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH (no western rockers for me) BECAUSE I'M SO PARTICULAR =D (i'd probably go "oi! take off your earring." or "aik... ANOTHER new tattoo ah?" or "shave half might as well shave bald") LOL.
CONCLUSION: I CAN BE A J-ROCK FAN BUT I CANNOT BE A J-ROCKER'S PARTNER, PAL, whatever it is lah..
random entry. =P

4 days and unawaiting

school's about to end and for the 1st time in my schooling history, i'm not anticipating it. at all. the presence of school holidays spell 1 1/2 months of probably loneliness... away from the hustle and bustle of friends.

what do i have lined up for me this hols? let me see...
- badminton centralised training! but it may be postponed because many of the players are participating in some yang yang tourney (i think). i wanted to go for the tourney but i have to play in the women's open so... i thought, forget it.
- youth camp in penang
- langkawi trip. dad's got a course in langkawi for the third time in a duration of 3 months. cool. chocolates, chocolates, chocolates. sun, sea and breeze... my favourite combo. i'm finally going there after 6 years!
- christmas! oh, but there's the headache of present-shopping
- other trips? not too sure...

there's so much to look forward to, but there's so much that's left behind... sweet, lingering memories that (hoppefully) will not be erased from my (failing) memory. people moving on in life or just entering a new phase or just ... leaving...

this year has been my toughest year in MGS so far... beating major-exam year 2006. nerves all hard and edgy, wound salt-rubbing, excess baggage, temporary sunshines, major "hangovers", tiresome transition.... typical.

oh yeah... results are out. i'm remaining in science 2. just a few more steps away from science 1 only. sigh... i really wish i did better, especially in add math and history. i suck at these two subjects (<-- understatement). some are promoted like glenna, ming ru, florence, kar kheng, mei kuan and some are demoted. new members to the class from up north and down under. not anticipating next year.

i'm currently reading new moon which i was eagerly awaiting. however, it was not as good as i expected. in fact, half of the book was disappointingly terribly boring. edward and bella get more melodramatic by the pages and sooner why was it only bella, jacob, bella, jacob, bella, jacob? jake's an oddball (to me) sophomore. bella's just playing dumb and flirting to her own benefit with jake, not listening to that "velvet" voice in her head and getting herself hurt (as usual). there's not much climax and it just like a series recurring events and mishaps. but the uno numero question is:

WHERE IS EDWARD?
WHERE IS EDWARD?
WHERE IS EDWARD?
WHERE IS EDWARD?
WHERE IS EDWARD?

He only appears for a mere 1/3 of the book. where are the cullens? the only thing that seems to occur is jacob's pursuit for bella who views him as merely her best friend and bella's own "series of unfortunate events" (<--another understatement). it's getting boring and i will not hesitate to scan through the book briefly although the lang is flowery till more exciting parts come.

so, conclusion ... new moon = DISAPPOINTMENT.
hopefully eclipse would be better.

currently listening to: miyavi - kimi ni negai wo
currently feeling: ...

Sunday, November 11, 2007

timeline: 21 hours

patience of 19 hours has begun to wear.
i'm eagerly waiting for just one message that may bring a tinge of hope and maybe a wave of remorse.

approx. 1525 hours 10/11/2007
i saw something that made me happy.

approx. 1610 hours 10/11/2007
i saw something that made me smile in amusement and heard something vaguely that probably would be good. really good.

approx. 1710 hours 10/11/2007
i saw something that spelled bad news and suspicion arose.

approx. 1730 hours 10/11/2007
i found out something that disgusted me.

approx. 1755 hours 10/11/2007
i was agitated and hoping that it wouldn't be as i suspected.

approx. 1830 hours 10/11/2007
i was still thinking of it. anxious.

approx. 2230 hours 10/11/2007
i rush to see a reply. negative.

approx. 2245 hours 10/11/2007
i am thinking of the worst-case scenario.

approx. 2300 hours 10/11/2007
i pray hard.

approx. 2310 hours 10/11/2007 - 0845 hours 11/11/2007
i am restless in my sleep. constant dreaming. well... it's been like that for the past few nights.

please don't be ...

1215 hours 11/11/2007
news! both bad and good. it's not what i suspected. that's good. but i have to run a race now. i'll make sure i'll win it.

sigh...

excess baggage

am i qualified to judge the living
the people that surround me
that walk about in this room of my life
that exhibits the right and wrong choices of mine?

am i to say that one is wrong
or to decide if one is right?

am i perfectly capable of throwing off
all the excess baggage on my shoulder
without damaging someone
but benefitting my spirit instead?

are you permitted to judgement
of me and the people around you
or that you should leave that up
to the One who hovers above and among us?

are you aware that decisions you make
can build up spirits and break down souls
while you bask in temporary rejoice
while others hide and lick permanent wounds?

are you looking carefully around you
to the pain you have caused
to the friendly spirit you have crushed
all because of an unexplained cold shoulder?

am i being far too harsh
or am i conveying reality
that decisions that you make upon others
have the power to give birth or destroy?


currently listening to: miyavi - jibun kakumei
currently feeling: impatient
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